krystalkatzficz | It's not pity (Reply)

Pairing: sakurai sho/ninomiya kazunari

Rating pg to nc17

Length: three parts

Genre: romance, incest, sho and Nino are brothers,

Ninomiya Kazunari sat on the edge of his plastic seat watching as his brother caught the oblong ball and hugged it to his chest before turning and dropping it down and kicking it towards the H posts scoring what was obviously the winning points for their school. Around him the crowds were going wild but Kazunari just clapped a little and then flashed his brother a tiny/awkward grin as the older teen turned to look at him and give him a thumbs up. Sho was being surrounded by his team mates as the He looked handsome with his hair clinging to his sweaty forehead and the way his shirt was riding up showing his stomach and the belly piercing he had gotten a few months ago. Kazu’s stomach dropped at the uncomfortable thoughts that were circling around in his head.

He wasn’t normal, he knew that, nobody else he knew fancied their brother the way that he did. His smile leaving his face he quickly stood up and left the rugby stadium. He felt sick and he couldn’t stay and listen to the cheers anymore. He and Sho hadn’t been brought up together, their parents had separated when he was only three. He had moved with his mother to Okinawa while Sho had stayed in Tokyo with their father. He had seen Sho since then as he often came to stay with them but it was only for a week at a time and it had always felt...Strange. Not like he was a stranger but...More like an old friend. He had never felt like he was meeting his brother although he was sure that was how Sho felt.

He could remember the exact moment he had realised that he was in love with his brother. It was when Sho was 18 and he was 15. They had gone to the beach near his home and Sho had stripped off, or at least down to a pair of tight swimming shorts that left nothing to the imagination. Until that point he had thought of Sho as nothing but an awkward nerd, and then he had seen his body. Taut with muscles that rippled as he moved and a dusky glow of a tan. He hadn’t been the only one to notice and for all the time they had been a the beach girls had flocked around Sho complimenting him and flirting. Jealousy had come on strong and Kazunari had wanted nothing more than shoo them all away and have Sho’s attention only on to him. He hated anyone that thought they had the right to touch what was his.

He had known in that moment that he wasn’t normal and from then on he had tried to spend as little time with Sho as possible in his visits hoping that it would settle down again but of course it hadn’t. The feelings he had gotten from seeing him had only cemented the idea that he was abnormal. When he had been looking at colleges he should have attended one in Okinawa but Sho had asked him to come and live with him here in Tokyo. He had gotten his own small apartment and if they both worked part time as well as studying then it would be perfect. Nino had wanted to say no but his mother had thought that it was a great idea and had encouraged him. Unable to find a reason not to, at least one that didn’t expose him, he had gone along with it and now he was living with his brother and trying his best not to let him know he was a freak.

“Yo, Kazu, wait up...Where you going?” Sho shouted behind him and Kazu froze for a moment and then carried on walking huffing;

“You asked me to come to your game, I did, now I have to go to the library...”

“Come on, you could at least be a little happy for me...” Sho said with a grin coming in close, so close that Kazu could smell the sweat on his skin mingled with the dirt and grass from the field. It wasn’t unpleasant, not unpleasant at all, and he stiffened and then swallowed as a thick lump collected in his throat. Sho seemed to notice his strange reaction and his grin slipped away. His eyes narrowed studying him for a moment and then leaned closer whispering “Kazu...”

“Sho! Where are you sneaking off to! You’re man of the match you can’t just vanish!” A chorus of voices shouted jovially from the ground and Kazu blinked as he saw the rest of the rugby team coming towards them. The sight caused Kazu to pull away from his brother and turn around sharply.

“Have fun, Nii-chan, congratulations” He said over his shoulder. He could feel the eyes of the team on him and he flinched as he heard them say;

“Wow, your brother is so stuck up...”

“He’s cute though, bit girly...Not like you...”

“Yeah, cute, but completely stuck up. Little brat...”

“Shut up, he’s not bad...” Sho said softly and Kazu couldn’t stay around to listen to more. His mind was screaming that Sho knew what was happening between them. He knew that he was a freak. He ran through the college campus towards the library. It was blissfully empty today and he made his way to the highly desired desks right at the back of the library. It was a spot that normally on the most popular students got as it was away from the stern woman who controlled the library with an iron fist. Kazu settled down and pulled out his books. He wasn’t going to be able to study but he needed something, something that was normal, something that wouldn’t make him feel any more sick than he already did.

He stared at the books with unseeing eyes wondering what Sho was going to do. It was understandable that he would be grossed out, he would probably tell him to leave, he could probably handle that. He could go back to his mum and attend the local college there but then he would have to explain to his mother. He couldn’t tell her the truth but he could think of something. Of course, there was a worse option, Sho could be sympathetic...He could be understanding and that would be worse than him being disgusted. A painful prickle of tears collected in the back of his eyes and he breathed deeply trying to stop them from falling but it wasn’t possible. His shoulders shook as he silently cried letting the tears roll down his face. He didn’t know how long he sat there crying in the empty library but he did notice that the daylight slipped away.

Arms wrapped around his shoulders and he gave a gasp struggling for a moment before he heard Sho whisper;

“I think we need to talk, ne?”

“Hate me...Don’t pity me...Please...I know I’m sick...”

TBC

A/N: Ahem...Three parts, i PROMISE...